A little turbulence...

Miss M is blessed to have weekly visitation with her mom and two siblings.  Each of the siblings are placed in different homes but all are transported each Saturday to a facility and the family gets to spend two hours together.  Miss M told me about these visits within minutes of coming to stay with me and I worked all week to make sure the transportation was arranged to come to the correct spot.  Since moving with me, she now has a further commute to get up to the arranged meeting place, which means that each Saturday I have about 3 1/2 hours to have a little "me" time to "fill my cup" as my agency on-going placement worker keeps telling me to work on and I have to report to her about it each time we meet.  I decided to use the time to get her school supplies and our weekly groceries.  It was nice to just shop alone.  I'm already learning about that luxury. 

When Miss M came back, she didn't say too much one way or the other about the visit and right back to playing with the play dough she had been playing with before leaving.  She did answer some questions I asked directly, but that was it.  However, as the day wore on and I needed her to do a few things, or not do a few things, I started to see/hear more whining, complaining, and begging then we have experienced in the last four days.  In our training they prepare you a lot for what to expect and how to handle visitations/visits with parents.  I can't imagine how hard that has to be for kids - any age.  I know after I visit my family for a week or so in Michigan, I have at least one or three days of a really hard adjustment when I come back and I'm an adult who chose to move away from home and can call or Skype home any time I want.  It really breaks my heart for the family - but at the same time I am so proud of Miss M's mom for getting the help she needs and working so hard to reunify her family.

I knew the best thing I could do with Miss M today was be consistent and simply repeat or rephrase my request or need calmly and with as much love and grace as possible.  There was a time during dinner tonight (we went to Chili's - Saturday night after church is going to be our "dinner date" night) that I finally said to her something about the fact that her behaviors and the way she was speaking (aka whining) was not working for me, or her, and that I needed her to know it.  She got really quiet and grabbed the nearby crayon and pen.

A few minutes later I received this note:

I thought it was funny that she used the term "pout" to describe her behavior.  I hadn't labeled her behavior choices as that, but that's obviously what she was choosing to do in her mind.

Without saying a word, I held out my hand to borrow the crayon and wrote back this note:

The smile I received in response from my little sunshine girl was priceless.

Tonight as we played roses and thorns she said "My one thorn today was that time at dinner when everything got really quiet and then I wrote the note."  I asked her if she still felt bad or sad about it and she responded with, "Well no, because you wrote me back."


Praise Report:
Miss M and I went to church this evening.  I serve as the storyteller for the large group of 1st - 3rd graders at the 4:30 service and then usually attend the 6pm adult service.  This means she will be in class one hour and the play room (for volunteer kids) the other hour.  By law, I can't make her go to church and technically if she refused to go, I would have to honor that. However, she loved church and her favorite part was the big group story.  Funny thing about that all was the first night here when I asked her when in the Bible she wanted us to start reading she said "the story with the guy, the girl, and the snake."  Then on Thursday, received my storytelling script for the week, imagine my surprise and delight when I saw that our new monthly focus was on the lesson of contentment and the first story this month was of "the guy, the girl, and the snake."  AND...that was the Bible story we were scheduled to read tonight in her children's bible.  I love how God works all things together for good!

Prayer Requests:
Please pray that I am wise with money.  I truly have the desire to buy her whatever she wants, needs, or might need.  I've never been good at money management - and I love to bless others with little things that make them feel special and loved.  However, I have to be wise and prudent with the funds we have.  We have enough - we are blessed - I just don't want to get carried away or foolish.