I have never read her blog before
But I know God put these words on her heart
In her blog today
For me.
Dear (Foster) Momma to a Stranger’s Child
I talk to you often in the work I do. I hear you say, “We want to hang in there”, or “We are doing the best we can”, and even, “I don’t know if I am up for this.” I hear these words through your shaky, weakened voices. But, what I really hear is you saying, “I don’t want to be another mother who disregards this child”, or “If I could, I would provide this child with every ounce of my being in order to heal him or her.”
You are walking in very heavy shoes. You
are feeling as though your efforts are disregarded, don’t matter, don’t
work, and will be forgotten about in the fleeting moments of a day. I’m
here to tell you, they are not. They are not disregarded. They do
matter. They work, and they will never be forgotten.
Dear Momma of a Stranger’s Child, you are
one of the bravest mothers of all. You’ve ventured into the murky
waters of loving a child whose hurts seem like they could go on for an
eternity.
You, dear Momma of a Stranger’s Child, you are a broken-hearted warrior.
You hear from others, “You are doing a good thing”, “I could never do what you do”, or “Your faith is bigger than this.” While
you hear these words of comfort and affirmation, your heart is
screaming in that silent, lonely place of wondering if you really are
doing a good thing, if you really should be doing what you are doing,
and if your faith really is bigger than this. You, dear Momma of a
Stranger’s Child, you wonder where God is in all of the hurts put on
children in His world.
You, dear Momma of a Stranger’s Child, you
long for rest. You grasp for answers, and you pray for healing. You
get angry. You wonder why any mother would neglect, be absent, abuse,
or completely disregard her child. You wonder why you are left to pick
up the pieces.
You want the Lord to step in, heal, and
completely restore the broken child in your arms. You cry and pray for
this so often that it feels as though you can no longer find the words,
or muster up the tears.
Dear Momma of a Stranger’s child, you were
once a broken child, too. At one time, you were lost in a world of
despair. You needed to be picked up, cleaned off, and captured by a
love so strong that the greatest army could not break it.
You were worth it. You were not forgotten. You were brought out of the darkness, and into the cleansing light.
YOU were meant to make a difference in the world.
Dear Momma of a Stranger’s Child, please do
not give up. You are the backbone to so many forgotten children. You
are a living example of an unconditional, incomparable type of love that
is a rarity in the world we find ourselves in.
You will get hurt. You will have many
sleepless nights. You will have some doubts, regrets, and desires for
do-overs. You will be exhausted. You will get angry. You may even be
ignored.
But….
Your Father in Heaven sees your actions. He
sits with you in the midnight hours when the stranger’s child is
raging. He is with you when you walk out of court rooms or meetings
still not knowing what the future holds for the child in your care. He
hears your pleas. He sings over you in your fretful night’s sleep.
Dear Momma of a Stranger’s Child, do you want to know why you are probably the most important mother in this world?
Perhaps someday, the little one
you are loving on, praying for, staying up all night with, advocating
for, crying over, taking in or letting go, will grow up to be a Momma
(or even a Daddy) to a Stranger’s Child.
Isn’t that worth it all?
(Dear Foster Momma to a Stranger's Child reposted from http://barrentoblessed.wordpress.com)
It made me weep.
I love fostering.
I really do.
I am called to do it.
I know I am,
And I know God equips those He calls,
But lately,
Honestly,
Bluntly,
It hasn't felt like it.
The good news is
That
After years of equating how I felt
To my relationship with God,
I know He doesn't operate that way.
He is there
And He is providing
And He does love me
Even when I don't like myself
Or "feel" equipped.
Like today
When I was driving home from work
And blaring the radio
At a deafening level
(Seriously...deafening)
In order to avoid getting into a verbal tug-of-war
With a certain 8 year old
Who I love more than words
But who can make me lose my temper faster than anyone
I was feeling
Anger
Lost
Confused
Annoyed
Mad
Frustrated
Hopeless
And then
I just went numb
Numb.
And
Then
This song was
Eventually played
When I was finally listening.
Oceans - By Hillsong
I know He is there.
Even when the temper tantrum
(On her part,
I,
Thankfully
Got over mine.)
Lasted another 2 hours,
Then stopped for a blessed 30 minutes
And then continued on straight through
Shower and Bed
Because He promises to be.
So
I'll let this fun song
That me and Little Man
Kind of love to car dance to
Be a little fun, simple anthem for now.
Beautiful Day - By Jamie Grace
Please pray for my little kiddos,
But,
Especially my Miz N.
Things are hard
And they are extra hard right now
For a number of reasons I cannot share.
(Believe me - there are a large number of reasons.)
Just pray for her.
Pray for her to think positive thoughts about herself.
Pray for her to see her worth in God's eyes.
Pray for her to find peace in the my love and God's love.
Pray for her to use self-control - in words, in actions, in deeds.
Pray for her.
