Only God

Only God could prepare a longing in Little Man's heart
To say
When I tucked him in bed last night
"I go see my mommy?
My daddy?
My _____? (Little brother's name)
My_____? (Big sister's name)"
He has never said that before
He has never asked for anyone at bedtime
Besides me
And it was the peace my heart needed
Once again
To be assured
That it is time for them to move home.

Only God could give A-girl the words to say
Out of the blue
During bath time tonight
"I will miss you, Momma Maryann,
When I go,
But you will still love me."
Just as I have been trying to prepare her heart for
For eight weeks
And
Before the tears could flow too fast
She farted
And giggled
And said, "I fart, Maryann, and I make you laugh
Because I is silly girl."
And I did laugh
Belly laugh.

Only God would lead their mom
To call me tonight
To tell me a funny story about one of the other kids
And we could talk like friends
And I could hear the excitement in her voice
But we could also talk about the reality of the move

Only God would open the doors
Wide open
To have three little misses move into my house
The morning after I move A-girl and Little Man home
(Well, two on Friday and the baby on Tuesday.)


Only God would initially introduced these
Three little misses
To me just over six weeks ago
And when I thought doors were closing
On opening my home to them
He was just saying
"Not yet."

Only God would have been keeping these
Three little misses safe
Until I could reunite them all in my house
And love on them all
And providing them with others to love on them during this time.

Only God would have a sense of humor
To have me,
The girl who was only going to foster school-aged kiddos,
Thrilled to pieces to be welcoming in a
5 year old
3 year old
And 6 week old.
(Yes.  6 weeks. You all pray for me.)

Only God would give me the opportunity
To meet the older girls today
And hang out
And take pictures
And make plans for picking them up on Friday morning.

Only God would be able to open my heart up
To the opportunity to love and foster
Another's mother's children
Again
And so immediately
After my Littles leave my home
(But never my heart)
And give me the peace
And give me the joy
Of three new little misses coming to my home
Knowing it will be temporary
Knowing it will be challenging
Knowing it will be painful
Knowing it is His will.

Only God.