All Because of a Chicken Bone

Today was a good day.
It was an all-day rainy day.
(Which is totally rare)
But
An incident with a chicken bone
Almost sent the day on it's head...

No visit this weekend.
(The girls' mom has a job
And had training today.
Which,
Like I told the girls,
Is a good thing.
A thing bringing them one step closer to being reunited.


So today was
House Hunt time
Haircut time
iPod down time
Homework time
Book report practice time
Colonial Test study time
TV time
Church Time

And then on the way home
I got us a bucket of chicken
From KFC
And then we had family movie night.
Little Rascals
(The remake)
Was on TV.
I loved watching them
Watch the movie
And seeing them
Laugh
Giggle
And groan
In all the right spots.

Then came the chicken bone.
Ms. O
(Who usually forgets to put her food down the garbage disposal)
Shoved hers down the garbage disposal
And then turned it on.
And then screamed at the noise it was making.
And I yelled for her to turn off the garbage disposal.
She finally did.

In my world
I saw it clearly as a situation as
"You shoved it down there,
You fish it out of there."

Simple.
Easy.
Done.


(I may recall a similar incident with myself as a kid
Except this was involving a spoon.)


So,
I told her she needed to get the pieces out of the garbage disposal.
Soon
I find her with a fork down the garbage disposal
Telling me she can't find anything.

I tell her to roll up her sleeve
Stick her hand down the garbage disposal
Get out the pieces of chicken bones

And
Then
The
Stand-Off
Began

Miss M was finally sent to bed
Prayers and kisses and tucked in
And Ms. O was still standing there
In front of the garbage disposal
With no intention of putting her hand down there.

Yes.
I could have done it.
But
Seriously
It's not that big of deal.
You shoved it in there.
You take it out of there.
Pleasant?
No.
Natural consequence?
Yes.

I let her stand there
And stew

And then began the talking,
On my part,
And the stare down from her.

1.  Nothing sharp down there.
2.  Nothing able to hurt you down there.
3.  Yes, it will be gross - but cheaper than replacing it.
4.  I would never make you do it, if you could get hurt.

More stewing.
More refusal.
All in silence.

And then came the count downs to the deadline for the chicken bones to be pulled out.
"You have 10 seconds to pull up your shirt sleeve."

I was like one of those parents counting down to three
Telling a kid they need to do something
And as I am counting down
I have ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE
As to what I will do if she doesn't do it by the count down.


I continue on with the steps
And the counting
And I modeled each step of the process
(Including sticking my own hand down there,
Repeatedly)

(Seriously - I should have just stopped the entire process, gotten out the iPad, and just captured this horrible moment of parenting.  It probably could have gone viral.  Oy.)


1.  Roll up the sleeve in 10 seconds.
2.  Put your hand in the garbage disposal in 10 seconds.
3.  Feel around the garbage disposal in 10 seconds.
4.  Go back in and find the pieces I can still feel in there.
5.  (Repeat step four about 6 times.)

Then I sent her to brush her teeth.
And I replay my choices
My words
My decisions while she's in there.

How do I heal this?
How do I make sure she doesn't
I don't
Go to bed angry?

She came out.
And
Without much thought
And without any warning

I grabbed her into a big hug.
And she hugged me right back.

I told her loved her.
I told her that I suspected she'd never throw a chicken bone down the garbage disposal again.
I told her that she was brave once she got over her stubbornness.

She apologized
On her own
For not just doing what I was asking.

I apologized for raising my voice and getting frustrated.

And then we laughed about it.

We laughed about my frustration at her stubbornness.
We laughed about her stubbornness over a stupid chicken bone.

God bless that chicken bone.
It might just be a stepping stone in breaking through with Ms. O.
Who knows?